This isn't a good post: I'm not asking you to read this.

I've always been one to fight the flow, to resist the growing views and norms of society, and to ask the question "Why?" as opposed to taking an immediate emotional stance on (almost) every issue.

First off, let me say something that you may never hear me say in person: I am a feminist. I believe that women deserve equal treatment as men, and men as women. I am not a female (or male) supremacist. We all coexist and struggle through this confusing world together, so what difference does it make whether I have a penis or a vagina? I'm a human. You're a human.

I'm not jumping into the boring 77 cents per dollar that women get in the workplace as compared to men. I also will not be focusing on the media's constant push for women to have "perfect" bodies. Nor will I be talking about the scattered advantages that come with being male or female.

No, instead, let's discuss rape, where a female is the victim.

More specifically, let's discuss the rapists' argument: "She was asking for it," and the rapee's argument, "My dress isn't a yes."

"Not asking for it. Rape is never the victim's fault."

"My dress is not a 'yes.' "

"Still not asking for it."

Rape is taboo. I've recently become a little less ignorant, and have tried to cut the word out of my vocabulary completely out of respect for those who cringe when they hear it. Someone you know has been raped. More than likely, one of your close friends has been raped; it's rampant in our society. Some blame the girls and women for how they were dressed, but most (rightly) blame the men.

It's always the man's fault. That's not even sarcasm in any way, shape, or form. The girl or woman being raped is never at fault. If she was at fault, logically speaking, it wouldn't be rape (unless of course the man didn't consent).

"Still not asking for it."

Good for you. I'm glad you have more respect for yourself than that. 

So what of how a girl dresses? If she's not asking for it regardless of whether she's in an 18th century dress, a ball gown, a suit, a mini skirt, a bikini, or buck naked, what's the difference? 

I recently saw a presentation on the bikini (http://bit.ly/1kZ4jYZ). The woman speaking presented the results of a study done on male Princeton students' brains while they observed women in various clothing. According to this study (and I'm paraphrasing a bit), when the men were shown women in less clothing, the part of the brain associated with tools became more active. Some of these students showed no activity in the medial pre-frontal cortex. This is the part of the brain that is used when considering someone else's feelings, thoughts, or emotions. The professor conducting the test was shocked, and related the results with the students seeing these women as objects, almost as non-human. There is another Princeton study referenced that echoes the same results: selfish thinking. In addition, "analysts at the National Geographic said that bikinis really do inspire men to view women as objects. As someone to be used, rather than someone to connect with." But oh wait, I forgot that the majority of people will throw out anything even mentioning religion, and this girl did say we are "made in his image." So those scientific findings are clearly no longer valid since they were voiced by someone religious.

I'm not a hermit. I know how people think; I know what people say. Just the other day I heard my friend talking about her clothing. She said, and I quote, "I wear low cut shirts when I have acne breakouts. I just live by the phrase, 'Look at my tits, not my zits!'" Interesting. It's like she knows it's going to draw attention or something. From my understanding, all girls realize this fundamental fact: Wearing high skirts and low shirts will cause 99% of guys to look. I only say 99% because I'm accounting for a rare, possible exception. I like to think I'm pretty respectful of women's bodies, but I look just like anyone else. Granted, if I catch myself I'm ashamed and make a point to not do it again, but it's always going to happen again at some point. Even the great Billy Graham struggled with this.

"Looking is one thing, acting is another. It's still the man's fault. It's not my fault he can't control himself."

Let me exaggerate that logic. You're the owner of a not-so-friendly pitbull. A small dog starts running around your yard or driveway. Your front door is open. What do you do in this situation?

Clearly if anything happens, it's not the little dog's fault; he or she is undoubtedly the victim here. It's the pitbull's fault 10 times out of 10. But hey, if that door gets closed, nothing can possibly happen. You just might get a little warm since you don't have as much of a breeze anymore.

Now I realize this analogy is flawed both ways. First, the little dog obviously didn't wear anything to entice the pitbull. Second, rape can still happen regardless of what women wear (although it is much less likely), so the door would have to be somehow breakable. But the point remains.

Girls, I can say with full confidence that you do not understand what runs through a guy's mind when you wear low shirts, high skirts, yoga pants, bikinis, etc. It's not your fault that we think like we do. And yet, it's not our fault either. If we choose to dwell on the thought, then yes--it's our fault for doing so. But the initial thoughts and mental reactions are literally inescapable.

And I am by no means blaming you girls for the rape culture against women. Hell no. I'm simply saying that some of you put yourself in a more vulnerable position. Yeah, I'm sure the attention is fun, and it's probably "more comfortable" (the reasoning I always hear), but the breeze is always strongest near the edge.

I'm not even going to touch on the arguments for self-respect. That's all up to you. I think I gave you enough to think about.  But I am curious. After seeing that title, why did you read this? Was it tempting? Did you enter without me asking you to? Did your curiosity get the best of you? 

I'm still not asking you to.